Day23-Nov 14

Today, saturday, i realized 2 things, all within a half an hour of each other, and the two related to the same thing. ok so let me tell you what i discovered today. At around 12:20 this morning, i was sitting in my dinner table doing some studying. I got hungry so i decided to go downstairs to my depaneur and buy a sandwich for lunch. So i got up, and headed towards the door, when i suddenly remember that i didn't put my makeup on this morning. So thinking nothing of it, i turn around and head back to the bathroom where i proceed to apply on some make-up, and fix my hair for the next 6-8 minutes. After doing so, i go downstairs, and before i can even say: "ham and cheese please", the guy asks me if i want the usual: ham and cheese. And i feel good about the fact that he remembers me enough to know what i usually order. But as i was going back upstairs to my apartment is when i realized the two things that are seriously wrong with this picture:

1. why on earth would i have to take 8 minutes of my life to put on make-up and fix my hair just to go downstairs for 2 minutes and buy a sandwich? why do i feel the need to fix the way i look even when i know i'm not going to run into anyone? i feel like i'm not explaining clearly why i think this is so disturbing, but it just is. i mean, 10 minutes? make-up? for a sandwich? what is wrong with me?

2. the second thing i realized is that the reason why the guy downstairs knew what i usually order is because i've eaten there 4 times in the last 6 days. and the more i think about this the more i find it ridiculous and absurd because i just went to the supermarket less than a week ago. this means that i have more than enough food in my house to prepare, so why do i keep eating out? why do i eat out so often? what is happening then to the food i buy? well, stuff like vegetables and some fruits actually go bad in my fridge which means i have to throw them away without eating them at all. Which means that i am creating an unnecessary amount of waste, and my consumption has reached unparallel levels which are contributing to my carbon footprint in this world, something i had actually vowed to try and reduce.



oh, and if you haven't noticed, i haven't said one thing about cigarettes today.
6 days and counting.
it's definitely becoming a bit easier every day.
but it continues to be a challenge.
a challenge i will overcome, and challenge i will never forget.