Today, as i was walking around the block just getting a breath of fresh air, i started thinking about my country. I started thinking about all the things that are wrong about Dominican Republic and whether it will ever find a way to grow, prosper, and grow. I know we're an incredibly poor country, but then why do we have such an abnormally high rate of consumption? Why is it that people would rather buy a fancy car than to find a roof to put over their childrens' heads? What kind of mentality does a country like that have? What kind of mentality did i grow up with? What kind of person am i? A person who is so used to watching kids begging on the streets that takes it as a given and couldn't even be bothered to give it a second thought. And knowing all along that whatever amount of money those kids get that day will not be going into food or a roof for their families but rather it will be going either to their fathers who will loose themselves in booze and probably beat them half to death, or it will be going to such things as paint or glue that the kids use as drugs to help them forget about the fact that they're so hungry? What about when i look at mothers who go out to the street with newborn babies in their arms just because they're smart enough to know that they will receive more compassion, and more money, by displaying their kids like manikins?
I know we're a poor country, but who is helping us? Our politicians are corrupt to the point that they don't even allocate a justified amount to education because deep down they'd rather the people stay illiterate and uneducated so that they can keep stealing and taking advantage without anything to worry about. How does someone respond to that? What, if anything, can i possibly do to help? And i know i'm one of the lucky ones, i have a home, i had the best education my country can offer, i get to travel and i get to study abroad. But i get here, and i look at Canada, and i look at how my friend who is a canadian resident actually receives a check from the government to 'help out' and i think about the way things are back home. And it makes me sad, and it makes me angry because honestly, i dont see a way out for us. I have no faith or conviction whatsoever that my country can someday be better.
I know this is not the kind of thing i should be writing in my journal, but this is mostly what i thought about today, it's what i felt like writing about, and i just needed to let it out.
PS: i know the dates don't match but it's because usually what i want to write about comes to mind randomly during the day, so if i don't have my computer with me i just write it in a word document and i post it later (i don't really know how to operate, or even access this blog from another computer, its kinda sad how technologically inept i am)
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